Diary of a Kitchen Witch

Cedar Water

Do you have those plant allies that go back a lifetime or so? Ok, maybe it’s not a full lifetime, but I have a few plant friends that have been prominent throughout this lifetime.

Rose has been in my life since infancy. I was not the best sleeper as a baby, a small one so my dad would take me on nature walks out back. He would hold me up to the roses (I swear they were 10 feet tall) and let me touch the petals. He would walk me around the garden until I calmed and went to sleep. Was this every night? No, my mom was stuck with the grunt work of getting me to sleep most of the time, and it was her responsibility to get my brother to sleep 100% of the time.

Another one of these plants that has been in my life since childhood is cedar. Cedar has been in my life, since roses, but I did not have a conscious awareness of it until I was in 5th grade or so, and I learned about its use as diapers for the Chinook people. That always stuck out to me, and I still lightly touch the bark every once in a while because it is very soft. Later in life, I put together that the climbing tree I had the pleasure of getting to know and getting stuck in throughout childhood was also a cedar. Cedar has been holding me on and off since I was 4 years old.

Last week, while I was in a mood, I decided to take the time to fix my attitude by creating a cedar hydrosol, especially after my Doug Fir water did not work out. I created this hydrosol as I have the others.

Tools:

• Large pot

• Small glass container

• A lid that fits the pot, turned upside down

Ingredients:

• Cedar Needles (I used some that have been drying since the winter solstice)

• Water, enough to where your needles are floating

• Ice

Method:

1. Rinse your plant(s). You want to get rid of any bugs.

2. Put your small glass container in the middle of your big pot.

3. Add the needles around the glass container.

4. Add the water. Put lid on upside down, making sure it is centered over your jar.

5. Turn heat up to a medium. then lower to a low once it starts simmering.

6. Put your ice on top of your lid to create condensation so the distilled water and essence drip into your jar.

7. I let mine got for about 40 minutes.

The water, hydrosol smells amazing. As it was distilling, I kept getting whiffs of the coast, of the beach house, of childhood. It was a strong scent, but it was calming, and my lungs felt clear. I have been fighting chest congestion since May. The steam was an amazing feeling. My apartment smelled like heaven.

***Please note that too much of the sawdust, bark dust of the cedar can lead to asthma and other respiratory issues due to an acid it produces. Please don’t sit an inhale bark dust. Loveyousomuch!

My sense of smell is very strong. It is stronger than my sight. There have been many moments where I am overwhelmed by environmental smells, smelling things that no one else is smelling, running from room to room (area to area) trying to find what has died… in places that aren’t home. One time it turned out to be baked Brussels Sprouts at school. I thought we were all getting poisoned, and I was about to evacuate my class. Other times, my ability to smell things that don’t exist (such as sewer leakages) is a warning that I am about to be down and out with a migraine.

Another thing that my sense of smell does is it casts me back to certain places and times. This cedar water sends me back to the beach house in Manzanita. Not when I visited as a teen or an adult, but as a child. I was once again the child who just wanted to sleep under the rainbow comforter, not the regular one, the child who would look outside and marvel at how many trees and mystery berries (they were salal berries) there were outside the window of the little cottage, the child who screamed bloody murder as she had to get the biggest sliver out of the bottom of her foot from walking barefoot on the unfinished deck… multiple times. The Oregon Coast, when you are off the beach, smells like cedar, rain, and salt.

I have been using this cedar water as a spray for about a week now. It is deep, woodsy, and rather masculine. I infused it with the intention of ancestral protection, wisdom, and calm. I also put angelite, petrified wood, and black tourmaline with the ice to help set the intention. Having the scent sitting lightly in my hair has been very grounding. In the moments when life seems too overwhelming, I am able to come back to my body through scent. It has also connected me to my inner child.

Cedar is a slow growing tree. It often is not successfully grown from seed as the deer and other animals with nimble it. Instead, it will often grown from a branch that has touched the earth, and it shoots out new roots. As seen above, the root systems are very involved. This was one of my favorite things that I learned from Braiding Sweetgrass.

I think the root system, the growing where you’re planted, surviving by planting the old to form the new is very indicative of how I have grown as a person. There are people who just have completely new lives, identities, etc. I have always been who I am, but each time a branch touches down, I begin to grow using the old as the base, but then expanding outward from there.

When I think of my inner child, I am often at a loss because I feel like I still am that child. I am still scared. I am still confused. I am still grumpy as my first line of defense. I am still empathetic to a fault, and I will fawn until the I feel safe again. I think the analogy of the cedar makes sense for me in connecting back to my inner child. I think my inner child is the base, the root of who I am now. Now, I just need to follow the root systems back to her and help water her and talk to her directly. This image also allows me to use that root system as a line of direct communication, to send love, compassion, and safety down directly to that original trunk, that original tree, my original self.

How do you connect with your inner child? Have you made progress with them?

I, again, have struggled. I feel like she’s doing pretty ok, but then as soon as conflict comes up, I am back to those survival techniques and am super triggered. I think where I struggle is watching people online talk about buying a Barbie for their inner child and feeling healed. That has not worked for me. Going to the water has though. Going to the land where I felt safe and loved has. Going to the land where I did not feel safe and then having good experiences has.

I would love to hear how you go about your inner child work. Aside from visiting specific bodies of water and patches of land, I will be using this cedar water to help ground, calm, and protect.

Wishing you well this week! May your life offer what you need in this moment.

With love,

Aventurine ✨