Halfway Through The Hermit Year, and I'm feeling...

A life update

disconnected. I have sat down so many times to write in the last two weeks, and nothing has come to me. Writing notes has been hard. Trying to write an entire love letter? Impossible.

As I sit here cutting out stickers, listening to books, and hiding out in the darkened house from the oppressive heat and heart-wrenching news cycles, I realized that we’re in a Hermit year. We’re in a Hermit year, and it’s ok if I pull back into myself a bit. It’s also ok for you to do so too if you need. Remember not to isolate though. We need others in order to feel well mentally.

Usually, this time of year is where I come into myself: the last days of school/work, roses are in bloom, berries are ripening, and I feel free. This year, I just feel disconnected from everything that has been who I have been for the last almost decade. The one constant that brings me back to my interests, who I am, what I love is tarot.

I wouldn’t say that I am depressed. I don’t feel depressed. I feel quiet. I feel lost in thought. I feel like being alone and away rather than celebratory and outgoing. Is it a normal cycle for me? Yes, but not in this season usually.

Things I have been enjoying:

• Group Coaching!!! Y’all are amazing, and I can’t fully express my gratitude to you for being so engaged, supportive, kind, and caring.

• River reads (reading at the river with some fries and watching the birds)

• Chilling on the balcony in the morning air with the cats. They sleep. I read.

• Reading. I’m reading books 7 and 8 of for this month, and it’s only the 9th.

• Our a/c. These 90+ degree days are awful and not what our PNW homes were built for.

• Cutting out stickers… constantly… obsessively. It’s calming as the world disintegrates around us.

• Watching my garden grow.

Things I’m hopeful for:

• Maybe getting this job at a teachers union. I REALLY, REALLY want it. I think I can do it and do it well.

• Maybe getting a teaching job because I desperately need decent insurance and some stable income.

• Assuming a job with income: home improvement!!!!

• Getting a strawberry off my strawberry plant.

Things I am grateful for:

• YOU

• Audiobooks from the library

• Libraries

• Hope

• Friendship

• Love

• Safe food

• Clean water

• HOME

• Income (limited as it may be) from tutoring.

• My garden

• Hosting and the resources with which to do it

There isn’t much on topic about this love letter, but I didn’t want to go radio silent. I am working on being more vulnerable, more human, less of a voice without a body. (I am still tethered to education though so my face and body will remain out of frame due to not wanting a witch hunt on my hands.)

How are you feeling this June? What are you grateful and/or hopeful for? What are you enjoying? I’d love to hear from you!!!

Wishing you well this week! May your life offer what you need in this moment.

With love,

Aventurine ✨

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